Tag Archives: childhood trauma

Protected: What to work on.

20 May

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Protected: No one want’s to touch it

9 Dec

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Protected: It could have been worse, it could have been better. I may never know.

9 Oct

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My description of my borderline

15 Sep

Most my blog followers have mental health issues, some with BPD. Here’s my description of borderline personality disorder. They’re talking about changing the name to emotionally unstable personality disorder. One of the criteria is unstable intense emoticons, that cycle really quick. From minutes to hours rarely more than a couple days; as opposed to mood disorders that have to last at least two weeks. My two main intense emotions are anxiety and sadness, anger is a typical one for most borderlines. I’m okay with borderline because it always feels like I’m on the border or edge. Also I think the name emotionally unstable personality disorder will be more stigmatizing. Another big thing is fear of abandonment, emotional or physical. Most people with BPD have different levels of childhood trauma. Abuse, neglect, and alcohol and drug abuse are common. It’s been said that children aren’t taught by their parents how to regulate themselves emotionally. Chronic feelings of emptiness and suicidality are other criteria. Self harm behaviors, suicidal gestures or threats. I had self harm behaviors but not the other two. People think those who have BPD are manipulative, it’s a big stereotype. I never feel good enough and have a problem with thinking my thinking is real. This has to do with invalidation and frequently being told your thoughts and feelings are wrong. I have really low self esteem which isn’t necessarily a characteristic of BPD but common with those. That plays with the abandonment fears, so since I’m a terrible evil horrible person so it makes sense people will ditch me. Here’s my description of how it manifests in me. It’s different in everyone and I have co-occurring disorders so some stuff overlaps and gets blurry.