I don’t feel like I have a lot to say. The holiday season is usually not the best for me, but October and March are always the worst. Last year at this time I was just starting my new medication regimen and I seemed much happier, or maybe just super relieved that months long depression was over. I’m doing okay, not really happy or sad and haven’t had any intense extreme emotion swings typical of BPD. I got my semester grades an A and a B, so I’m right on track for my UC Davis transfer agreement. All I need to do is complete all of next semester’s plan courses and maintain a GPA of 3.2 or better. Barring a great crisis catastrophe it should be easy. I don’t feel happy about it, maybe relieved. I’ve been really struggling with feelings of emptiness that result in suicidal thinking because of no purpose or meaning in life. Which makes me feel stupid because life is going relatively well, other than these empty feelings.