To dream of death

5 Nov

The day is not going well. 

My automatic thoughts go to death. 

Oh how I just want this to be over. 

I have plans and a possible future but still the mind wanders to death. 

This can’t be normal, just a state of ambivalence. 

I won’t do anything, I don’t have the motivation or the drive. 

Sometimes I wonder if I have the motivation or drive to live. 

To me living is just the absence of death, the default. 

If there is a God, please kill me now. 

I’ve had enough. 

4 Responses to “To dream of death”

  1. manyofus1980 November 6, 2015 at 4:29 AM #

    hugs Marcie. its difficult. I know that. hope your ok. XX

  2. socialworkerangela November 6, 2015 at 7:49 AM #

    I dreamed of death this week too… Hugs

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