Late night post

19 Jul

I want to die.  I see no future and I haven’t had an impact here.  They are right there is no reason to keep going.  Everything is lies.  I can’t because I have to suffer.  This is all in my head.  I make up my own pain and do this to myself.  Why won’t you let me go, at least then I can’t do this to myself anymore.  I won’t have to deal with the pain, where ever it comes from.  I can’t function consistently, there is no med or therapy that can keep me out of the hospital.  I don’t want to be someone who has to be taken care of for the rest of her life.  I gotta be real, it’s that or death.

6 Responses to “Late night post”

  1. socialworkerangela July 19, 2015 at 10:24 AM #

    I read your blog and it has meaning to me… I hope you find purpose cuz I think you do have one. Hugs your way.

  2. Andi July 19, 2015 at 2:38 PM #

    I’m so sorry you’re struggling right now.

  3. manyofus1980 July 19, 2015 at 9:09 PM #

    I’m so sorry you think this is the only option for you now. It isnt. There is always hope, always another possibility. Keep fighting. We’d miss you if you were gone. XX


  1. 7/19/15 | Marci, Mental Health, & More - July 19, 2015

    […]  I spent most the day with my sister but I never said anything, she didn’t know I wrote yesterday night’s blog while crying for an hour when I was staying the night at her house.  I wrote a little on my blog […]

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