I used to want to be a boy

8 Mar


I didn’t know what transgenderism was and I didn’t necessarily think I was born in the wrong body. I was just never a girly girl and most that stuff annoyed me or made me uncomfortable. There was also the issue that I liked girls and I thought being a boy would make things so much easier. I still hate my boobs most of the time, and who really wants a period. But I’m getting more comfortable in my skin. I still sometimes think I have more of a boy personality or get along with the boys, but that’s just me.

12 Responses to “I used to want to be a boy”

  1. blahpolar March 8, 2015 at 12:17 AM #

    Me too, was a total tomboy. Now I’m butch and happy about being a woman too.

    • doomcore March 8, 2015 at 5:21 AM #

      I’m the opposite. I was girly as a child. By age 10, though, I started to feel like a clown in the dresses my mom loved to see me in. I wasn’t allowed to get carpenter pants until I was 12 or so, and I never went back. I don’t feel like a woman or a man.

      • mm172001 March 8, 2015 at 11:13 AM #

        That’s interesting, I don’t think I have ever talked to someone who doesn’t feel like they identify with either of the genders. I have a friend who is androgynous and he prefers acting/dressing/presenting male most times but other times female.

    • mm172001 March 8, 2015 at 11:04 AM #

      I don’t know if I was a total tomboy, memory issues will due that to you. But I really remember my pre-teen and teen years where I didn’t like to shop (unless it was for like candy or something like that), wouldn’t wear make up, didn’t like dresses and really didn’t like clothes that showed off my developing body.
      I wouldn’t say I’m butch or lipstick lesbian, something in between. But I’m getting more comfortable now that I don’t feel so weird.

  2. myskinblues March 8, 2015 at 7:31 AM #

    As a kid, I also wanted to be a boy. I felt boy.
    Being a girl, a woman disturbed me, but I had never given much importance to the issue, in that I had never thought of being born in the wrong body, just as you say.

    Then during university I started to accept my being a woman and to feel woman.
    It’s been a very slow process, actually it is still in the being, and what I notice is that I am progressively more confortable in having my body and being a woman — I do struggle with eating disorders, body image issues and dysmorphophobia, but they’re not related to sexuality.

    I don’t know what made me go into this acceptance process, though, and I don’t know whether acknowledging I’m bisexual constituted a cause or a consequence of it. But I don’t really care in making timelines and identifying causes and effects, what’s important is that now I am fine with it 🙂

    I like both men and women, I get along more with man that with women, but yes, again as you say, it’s just me 🙂

    • mm172001 March 8, 2015 at 11:06 AM #

      Thanks for the comment. Most people I have had a similar discussion like this consider themselves transgender so it’s nice to hear a new perspective.

      • myskinblues March 8, 2015 at 12:28 PM #

        I’m glad that you appreciated the comment.
        A couple of years ago I came across this very same topic, and I was astonished by the fact that most people consider this ‘feeling a boy’ into the framework of transgenderism. I have never given any importance to it, or better, I have never felt the need to use a label to describe it. It is fine just the way it is.

  3. Cat March 8, 2015 at 9:34 AM #

    You know already I am gay. I am not camp in any way, but my brain is almost completely female. When I was a little boy, I remember the disappointment that I was not a little girl and through my early life, I had to learn to be a male and adopt male behaviours. I am 52 and attitudes back then were worlds apart from today. If I was a teenager today, I might have seriously considered gender reassignment

    • mm172001 March 8, 2015 at 11:09 AM #

      Isn’t it amazing how far we have come. I use to let my younger sisters put make up on me and bikinis because I thought that’s what girls did. We’re still not these as a society, I have friends all over the spectrum but that it’s talked about and done by some is amazing.
      I hope as you’ve grown up you realize you don’t have to do those male roles anymore if you don’t want to. I know gender can follow all kinds of things from personal, social, job roles, to how we dress, etc….

      • Cat March 8, 2015 at 12:06 PM #

        Yes, I am comfortable being me and have found a happy balance between masculine and feminine thinking, but most of all I am at peace being male and have no inclination to either play out a female role or become one. I admire those who do regardless of age.

  4. manyofus1980 March 9, 2015 at 4:45 PM #

    My partner is not a girly girl either. I am though. It is hard when you have urges like you describe like the wanting to be a boy because you think you’d fit in better. I hope now that your exploring your sexuality a little bit more that your happier. XX

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