It’s been crazy busy

4 Feb

It’s been awhile since I last blogged part of it was the fall out from one of the posts I wrote the main reason however is that I’ve been busier than all get out.  After I wrote my post Shame on me, my sister read it and called me the next morning confronting me on it.  It just started another argument and some more crying, luckily I didn’t have as intense of a reaction as I did originally on Sunday.  Also on Monday I was feeling nauseous and faint all day long, I have long struggled with strangle physical complaints and discomforts that have never been addressed and no one can figure out.  At one point at school I thought I was going to throw up so I went and sat on the floor in the bathroom stall for about 10 minutes till I felt a little better.  Monday evening I had a date with my girlfriend, we were meant to be watching a movie but we ended up leaving early, (I think she didn’t think I liked the movie.)  We hung out in the car and talked until she had to drive home.  I mentioned that I’m on a lot of medication that makes me sleepy and I’ve been on and off different medications since I was 10.  I’m trying to slowly ease into my psych issues.  After the date I went to bed.

Tuesday was a busy day too and it threw me for a loop.  My Italian teacher had canceled class last Thursday due to health reasons and yesterday we had a sub.  Turns out my regular professor will be on leave for at least a month and this sub will take over teaching.  I don’t like changes in professors because they all have different styles.  The good thing is just just got this news and already had plans so this Thursday class is canceled.  That’s good because I had to miss class anyways for a trip to Canada I’m taking with my sister.  I had my DBT class in the evening and will be doing two separate posts on it and resources.  It did get uncomfortable at one point because a member in the class didn’t like the way the teachers were leading and kept making comments about not coming back and how they were bad leaders.  She was also sitting next to me 😦  After I came home from DBT we had family dinner night and game night, at the request of my brother-in-law

Today was my last day of class for the week and I’m leaving for Canada tomorrow.  I’m a little concerned about how this trip will go because of the discord with my sister from the last trip.  I woke up with a text from my girlfriend that confsued me something about her being sorry if she upset me.  I thought this was about the movie Monday and just replied I was fine.  Imagine my surprise when I get a text back that says she read my blog, specifically What does she see in me?, and want’s to make sure she doesn’t hurt me and I know that I’m loved and cared about.  First reaction, OH MY GOD! HOW DID SHE FIND MY BLOG?  WILL OTHERS? next reaction I wonder how much of it she read.  And finally how am I going to try and explain I’m not comfortable with her reading my blog or how can I make it inaccessible to her.  This is all part of what I did a DBT homework sheet on.  I’m trying not to freak out and she isn’t really responding to the texts specifically about the blog.

8 Responses to “It’s been crazy busy”

  1. manyofus1980 February 4, 2015 at 7:23 PM #

    Marcie, it wouldnt be hard to find your blog. If you google your name it comes up. Try it. You have a .com domain, so that makes it easier to find! Also dont you post it to facebook? Is she on your facebook page? I hope you can work it out. I’m sure she’ll be understanding about it if she’s read any of it. X good luck on the trip too

    • mm172001 February 4, 2015 at 9:11 PM #

      I just don’t think I even mentioned having a blog. Also we’ve only been together for about 3 weeks so it’s kinda weird if she is googling my name. She is on my personal facebook page but not my blog facebook page they are not connected to each other. And if they are that is my real concern because I DON’T want my facebook friends reading my blog. I hope it works out and I’m just worrying over nothing.

  2. Fumbling Through Therapy February 4, 2015 at 7:53 PM #

    Gosh, I definitely wouldn’t want certain people reading my blog. Maybe you can edit it and then make it more anonymous? Either way, I hope you can figure something out.

    • mm172001 February 4, 2015 at 9:13 PM #

      I allow certain people in my life to read my blog but am very selective about it. I use my first name and post pictures of myself to the blog but try to keep others anonymous. The only way I can think of it is to password protect posts, make it a private view only blog, or change domains. None of which seem appealing, I’ve had this blog since 2012. I’m stressin but hopefully it’s nothing.

      • Fumbling Through Therapy February 5, 2015 at 5:52 AM #

        Yeah, hopefully. I would just hate for you to feel like you have to start censoring yourself because having the freedom to write what’s real is what makes personal blogs so beautiful and healing.

  3. randomblog2014 February 5, 2015 at 3:07 PM #

    it’s too bad tat reading your post didn’t help your sister understand your point of view a bit better!

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