Boundaries

28 Nov

I feel like I never know where and what the boundaries are in different relationships, so I just err on the side of caution. I know the borderline and social anxiety play a part into this. I think I’m inherently needy so a lot of times when I feel like reaching out I don’t. I don’t want to be seen as clingy or desperate and even more so I don’t want to be let down. Another thing that complicates matters is there are only a few people I feel really comfortable around and like I can let the true Marci show through. People I’ll reach out to, people I can relax around and just be me. Even with these people sometimes I go into analyzing mode after interactions, to see if I did anything wrong. Like I said I wish there were rules in friendship. Better yet for each person in my life if they came with a user manual and rule book.

3 Responses to “Boundaries”

  1. Kyra November 28, 2014 at 6:45 PM #

    I do the same exact thing. I’m so afraid of being this black hold of neediness that I never reach out, and all my relationships just fade away from neglect. I’m sure the other person doesn’t always want to have to be the one to initiate interactions, but I’m so sure that I’m an annoyance and that everyone secretly hates me and wants to get rid of me that I literally can’t initiate anything. It sucks, and it leaves us really isolated. Sorry you’re dealing with it too.

    • mm172001 November 29, 2014 at 12:15 PM #

      Yep you nailed it. I’m getting better with reaching out but the default thoughts you mention are all still there.

  2. manyofus1980 December 24, 2014 at 4:19 AM #

    Things can be so complex cant they? I am not to good at reaching out either, but like you, am getting better at it. It takes practice I think. XX

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