The disconnect

19 Nov

Today was a busy day I saw the therapist this morning and then my case manager later in the afternoon before my night class.  The therapist seems impressed with how well I am doing and is going to talk to the people leading the year long DBT program about me joining it.  Before all my referrals were stopped because you are suppose to be stable which means no hospitalizations, partials, IOPs, or anything like that with in the last year.  I’ve been in the hospital 3 times, partial for a month, and IOP a couple times…  I guess I seem stabler now and my therapist can recommend me for it.  I should know at our next appointment, Christmas Eve, if I will be starting the year long DBT program in January.  The therapist also recommended I re-take the anxiety class I took before, it’s two two hour sessions, I’ve done it before but don’t remember a lot and wasn’t really in a good place either.

My case manager and I just chatted for most the time because there is nothing really major going on right now.  I mentioned the DBT thing and she said she had read that in my chart.  She said I seemed brighter too.  Towards the end I mentioned some of what I had realized in my prior post Mothers and Interesting Thought.  She said that she couldn’t think of what would make a child disconnect from their parents in the way that I did.  I had mentioned how I have no attachment to emotions of what has gone on, no memories, and no real feelings toward it.  She gave an example of how little kids will like act cute or like a clown when their parents are mad to distract them and they see that it works.  I don’t really know if that is meant as I don’t try to connect because I know it won’t work and that’s based on trying to much in the past or if it’s just the fact that I know it won’t work.  I have a certain level of disconnect with my dad too, but nothing like my mom.

3 Responses to “The disconnect”

  1. sistasertraline November 20, 2014 at 7:47 AM #

    I kind of ‘misbehave’ in my schema sessions, don’t know why, it’s hard to work out isn’t it?

  2. manyofus1980 November 23, 2014 at 3:19 PM #

    I hope if you do start DBT that you get something out of it. It does seem like it would be a good thing to do. I had an assessment to start it but then we decided to stay with our current therapist instead of going for DBT. XX

    • mm172001 November 24, 2014 at 12:13 PM #

      I’ve done this program before but dropped out, I’d like to give it another go. I will still be seeing my therapist, case manager, psychiatrist, and talking to my intensive case manager it’s just an extra group I will go to weekly for a year.

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